I'm happily (and excitedly) on Day 3 of this two week boot camp but for now - - - here is my response to Day 2's writing prompt.
I warn you in advance - I've been experiencing feelings of negativity, violence, and pure female bitterness and hate this week. It happens to the best of us. Truly.
How about a disclaimer?
This piece is in no way true and was NOT inspired by true events (although I could select a well-suited ex-boyfriend to fit the picture...actually I could choose a few)...but I digress...this is all in fun. :D
The One That Got Away
You bump into an ex-lover on Valentine’s Day—the one whom you often call “The One That Got Away.” What happens?
I nut punch him.
It’s Valentine’s Day. One of the most evil holidays that are bound to disappoint you whether you’re snugly attached to someone or you’re sadly alone in the world, your match seemingly lost in the overall population.
So yeah. This “one.” This “one” that got away?
Sure I let him leave. In fact, I dared him to leave. I certainly don't need a lover-boy by my side to make it in this world. And he did. He left the next minute and I never heard from him again.
For that he deserves a swift and painful nut punch.
This makes him unhappy and, simultaneously, my thirst for revenge is once and for all quenched. That’s all that matters to me on this sad and unfortunate day.
Thankfully (or unfortunately - depending on how sadistic you are) there weren't too many witnesses. And those that saw the sheer act of female-against-male violence were too surprised to react.
I mutter “he deserves it” and stalk off to move on with my life. Revenge against ex boy-toy? Check!
Later on, when I have time to reflect on the day's events, I realize that I’m not necessarily proud of my reaction to his unplanned appearance in my sunshiny day. I act before I think. I react when I should think.
And, admittedly, I do have violent tendencies. Should I seek help? Do I really need to read a book about fixing that? No doubt options are unlimited. How to be happy. How to not nut-punch your ex-boyfriend. How to be the best you. How to spot bullshit in a book sold for $24.95.
Oh well. What's done is done. Bye bye, ex-lover.
I don’t need you even if you are, or were, “the one that got away.”
And I think I’ll keep my violent tendencies as company for now...